Journaling
Journaling is one tool that has shown me how to truly be my own best friend. In writing my thoughts on paper, I was able to see how I was speaking to myself. The idea of being your own best friend is a concept I think many people are willing to say they have an understanding of, but what does it really mean?
For me, it means giving myself praise, and thought correcting. When I notice my inner voice (my therapist and I call him 'el turdo') calling me down, I am able to correct myself much easier. We tend to go about our days with this voice piling on as we don't notice how often it may be adding negative thoughts; "you dropped a cup, you're so dumb", "I can't believe I said that, they must think I'm so stupid", and so on.
In writing down my thoughts, I was able to visually see how often el turdo was taking the wheel. One thing that has really helped me course-correct is, "would I talk to my friends this way? No? So why am I speaking to myself this way?" - after that realization, and putting in the real work, everything changed.
I like to journal as often as I can, and when I first started my healing journey, it was just about every day. Something to keep in mind is that when we start to feel better, it's because we are doing the work. If we stop doing the work, our issues may creep up again. Keep doing the work, even if you are feeling better. That's a sign it is working. It's like exercise, but for your mind. Just because your body is starting to slim down, that doesn't mean you can be a couch potato and expect the same results as if you were working out every day!
Keep a journal where you can be completely honest with yourself. Where no one has access to it. This is important. If you feel that privacy may be an issue, it's okay to tear out pages and rip them out when you're done. The key here is to be able to be completely open, honest and vulnerable with yourself and to try to journal at least once every day to start. Three times a week after two months is a happy medium I have found for myself therafter.